Chat Room Etiquette: 15 Unwritten Rules Regulars Expect You to Know

Every room has rules on a page and rules in practice. The second set is the one that decides how people treat you.

In short: Good chat etiquette comes down to three things: do not shout, do not spam, and contribute before you ask for anything. Everything else is detail.

Arriving

Read for a minute. Greet the room. Do not walk in with a demand, a link or an argument. Do not announce your gender and expect that to count as a personality.

Talking

No all-caps. No message split across eight lines. No repeating yourself because nobody answered in thirty seconds. No correcting everyone's spelling - chat is speech, not an exam.

Private messages

Ask, or at least say hello publicly first. Unsolicited private messages are the single most common complaint in every mixed room on the internet.

Disagreement

Argue with the point, not the person. When a disagreement stops being interesting, drop it. Nobody has ever won an argument by outlasting a chat room.

Things that get you banned

Harassment, threats, racism, sexual messages to people who did not ask, links to malware, advertising, and abusing minors or claiming to be one. Moderators act on these without discussion, as they should.

Leaving

Say goodbye. It costs two seconds and it is the difference between being a person and being a name that stopped typing.

Frequently asked questions

Is typing in capitals rude?

Yes, it reads as shouting.

Can I send a private message to anyone?

Greet them publicly first. Unsolicited messages annoy most users.

What gets people banned?

Harassment, hate speech, spam, malicious links and unwanted sexual content.

Should I say goodbye?

Yes, it takes two seconds and regulars notice.

Do I have to use perfect English?

No. Rooms are full of second-language speakers and nobody cares about typos.

Related guides

Join a chat room now

The rooms are free, open around the clock and need nothing but a nickname. Pick a name, say hello and see who is online.